Saturday, February 19, 2011

Violet's Smile

Violet has her Daddy's smile. It hit me today when she sat on Richard's lap and both were just radiating at me. My Dad had said from the beginning that she looks a lot more like Richard's side of the family (his mom in particular) than Lily does, but I have never noticed it as much as today. She has his lips that are thinner than mine and those adorable little dimples in her cheeks, just like him. I love those moments when, out of a sudden, I am stopped in the tracks by little things like that. Those moments that make me smile and open my heart, being washed over by a wave of love and pure happiness.

I remember when Violet was born and the midwife student commented that it looks as if Violet had dark hair; Richard responded that she would be looking more like him then, since Lily had blond hair like I. Once she was cleaned up she turned out having strawberry blond hair and was even lighter than Lily was (she actually did have darker hair at birth). But despite her blond hair and blue eyes, she turned out looking like her Daddy and, as far as one can say at this point, is also very similar in character to him while Lily is always commented on as being a mini-Stephanie.

But while they might look like us or are even similar in character, they are still personalities of their own, changing, adapting, growing; and I feel honored to be there for our little girls supporting them to become the women they are supposed to be. In the meantime, I enjoy spotting every little similarity, difference, and everything in between about them.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

The Firefighter-Butterfly Dilemma (Please Read & Vote!)

I know, the title sounds completely weird, but it just describes a surprisingly difficult decision (if not of far-reaching consequences) I have to make soon: There is a carnival party at Lily's Kindergarten in a couple of weeks, and I can't make my mind up as what to dress her up.

Lily is a girl with many interests, and one never knows what she will feel like doing or wearing next. Most of the time, if asked what she wanted to wear, she'll just get some shirt and a pair of jeans. Sometimes, however, she will insist on dressing up in one of her nice dresses and ballet flats even though it's just a lazy weekend at home or dance through the house in her little ballerina suit all day long. She loves trains, fire-engines, lego and dolls; butterflies, bunnies, lions, crocodiles, horses, hippos, and penguins, and many, many more things. Going through the carnival section, I have seen tons of costumes, most of which I just couldn't imagine Lily wearing (I'm sorry, but I consider a toddler in a corsage kind of inappropriate) or are just not right for the season. The two choices I am down to at the moment is buying her a butterfly set or a fire fighter costume.

I know she would be ok with either outfit, but the fire fighter she would LOVE! I'm sure she would also like the butterfly costume, but the fire fighter she would go crazy over. So what is the problem you may ask? The problem is that for quite a while I almost constantly have to deal with the accusations that I try to turn our little girl into a boy just because I let her be herself and don't doll her up constantly. Yes, she is a tomboy at times, but that is not me steering her in a direction, it is she expressing herself. Yes, I am really sick and tired of these accusations, and that is why I hesitate to go with the fire fighter. The easiest solution would be simply to take Lily to the store, but knowing our daughter I have no doubt that we would leave the store with butterfly wings and a fire fighter helmet, and that she will insist of wearing both for the party. Maybe this would actually be the best (and funniest) option, but one that will definitely cause a lot of raised eyebrows.

What are your thoughts about it? Input and a vote would be greatly appreciated!

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Caution: Serious Rant!!!

Ok, I've tried to deal with this whole issue privately, but even after a week, I'm still about as pee'd off as I've been in the beginning. If you're not interested in rants, please don't waste your time, because there will be plenty on it *family friendly though!*

As it might be known, I have a sister, whose daughter is almost exactly a year younger than Lily. Ever since I've known her, she's almost constantly been sick with the sniffles and coughs. At least whenever we are around. And just as regularly, our girls end up with coughs and sniffles just after seeing their cousin. I am a person to whom consideration is important. I would never subject other kids to my kids' bugs. I rather cancel a play date or family get-together than risking other kids getting sick because of Lily or Violet. To us, that is just the right thing to do, going along the line of putting your kids before your own needs or interests and being considerate to other people. And if others don't understand that, their bad.

However, at this point, I am just furious. It has not only happened a couple of times that our girls ended up sick after meeting with my sister and her daughter, but on a regular basis. And it's not an accident that our girls get sick because of playing and spray contamination. My sister openly supports the germ exchange by making them share spoons (yes, she still spoon-feeds her 2-year old, and does the same to Lily if given the chance even though Lily eats by herself since she's been 9 months old!!) and cups, even though she knows that her daughter is sick. She doesn't cover her mouth when she's coughing either. I caught my niece coughing in Violet's face while my sister stood by and watched. Being this inconsiderate to other people, adults or children, is what just makes me freak out. I have not had any contact with my family for a week now because I won't be able to speak to my sister, not even for a minute, this is how mad I still am. Even though I am a very peaceful person, I want to punch her in the face each time Lily or Violet wake up coughing their little lungs out. The other morning I was nursing Violet and she hat to stop every few seconds and draw some breaths through her mouth because her sinuses were so congested; it is heart-breaking to watch my poor little girls suffer just because one person is just too inconsiderate at best and simply mean-spirited at worst to protect them even the least.

Some helpful suggestions how to handle the situation or how to calm down would be highly appreciated!

Thursday, February 3, 2011


Three years ago today was Superbowl Sunday for most. For us, it marked the first day of our new life as parents. After having somewhat recovered from nearly 60 hours of labor and a birth that went nothing like I had imagined, we were finally able to hold our daughter. I cannot describe this moment. It was, as if my heart had been born into this world, and I would do everything I had to to keep her safe. Yesterday, Lily celebrated her third birthday. Since this sunny and freezing February day in Kansas we have moved three times, met a new family who will always be in our hearts no matter how far we are away, reconnected with old friends and added another little wonder to our family. When I look at Lily today I cannot imagine that she used to be this little helpless baby of from 3 years ago. She has become a strong person who has lived through all the changes in her young life with an amazing spirit. A kind heart that displays a compassion rare in someone as young as herself. A little rebel who makes us rolling on the floor laughing. She is our little sunshine who can brighten up a room at 6 am and a little tornado who can tear up a living room in mere moments. At this evening three years ago I would have never imagined the joy ahead of us; and even though my nights might be busy at times and our bed crowded, even though candle-light dinners with just Richard and I happen a few times a year at best and the entire house is always covered with toys, I wouldn't want to be a single day without my girls. Being a parent is not always a walk in the park, but every day our girls are repaying us a thousand-fold and more without even knowing it. Happy Birthday to my big girl; I love you more than words could ever express and I'm proud that you call me your Mami!