"We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves"
His Holiness, The 14th Dalai Lama
There are so many things the Dalai Lama says that speak right to my heart. There is a book, The Art of Happiness, written by an American psychologist based on several lectures by and personal interviews with the Dalai Lama. I read this book about once a year, to ground me, to re-focus on what is important.
So why did I chose exactly this quote? I am not at peace with myself, I know that, and it's probably my greatest struggle right now. I feel constantly judged by people on the outside; to be honest, I don't just feel jusged, I am being judged. And it hurts me, because in their eyes I always come out lacking. But I also know that no matter what I do, I will never be deserving in their eyes; in order to be accepted, I would have to completely deny myself, which I am neither able nor willing to do. Nevertheless, I am still struggling to rise in their estimation, to obtain their respect, and make them like me; I waste energy, time, thoughts, worries, and tears on them, none of which they deserve. It was decided early on after they met me that I would be the stone in their shoes and ever since they let me feel my position. It hurts, but I know that I have to focus on what is important. I have to let go of my attempts to please people I will never be able to please and put that energy towards my family and friends, and on working on my own issues. I know that one day, I will be at peace with the outer world, because once I am at peace with myself, they won't matter any more, and I will be at peace with the outer world as well.
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Great reminder! It can be so discouraging to look at our world and the things that go wrong, but I have to remind myself that change starts within!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for stopping by and offering your input, Jessica. I agree that change starts within. I wished that more people, especially those in power actually understood that and did what was necessary to change the big picture. A friend of mine recentlx did an internship in Ramallah. She had a lot of great interaction with both Israelis and Palestinians, and noticed that both parties are just terrified of the other. Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be a solution of this conflict in near future.
DeleteFirst of all this is a great quote! Second, i have to say that the less you try to please others and be what they want you to be, the happier you will be. I know that from experience. I used to try to please everyone all the time, and all it got me was unhappy and not at peace. Thankfully, over time I've learned to concentrate on myself more and what matters which is my family, and not worry so much about what other people want me to be! Wishing you the peace you seek.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your comment, Jessica. I definitely see that I have a problem; however, I seem not to be at the point yet where I can let it go. I have good phases, but then there are bad ones. I'm just working on stretching the good phases, and maybe one day I'll find the solution for me ;-)
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